So I am sick, in bed with flu, naked of course, falling between sleep and scouring Netflix for queer christmas movies. What else you gonna do? It’s the holidays. I’ve watched The Feels, Duck Butter, Below Her Mouth and I know Carol is there too, and is pretty much the only one with the most christmasness in it, but I’ve seen it already and it makes me guilty about not having read the book, which, I got for Christmas… one day, one day.
I finish Lady Gaga’s Netflix lastest, Gaga: five foot two where you get to follow her around revealing the mental and physical pain, and heartbreak she’s boren (no such word but it fits). In the doc, not to spoil it, but one of her heights (to her mind), is to play the superbowl intermission. Personally I like that she can go to the supermarket in her bra to buy her album and the store guy doesn’t recognise her and tells her to switch off the cameras. Someone soon puts him straight… and then he is having his pictures taken with her. She is overturning reality by the cameras being on, its nice that that moment was not edited out. She buys two copies of her new album on the self-checkout.
Where is this going …? You have to remember I am delirious, and its maybe not the best place to write from to make any sense, but i think I had a great idea, a thought experiment that could overturn the reality of where we are and where we pretend to be in the world. Probably most people think – thank fuck, it’s christmas, we can forget all this crazy shit: the suicide no deal of brexit, the human-induced climate extinction nightmare, the austerity-induced UK misery, the Trump wall and retreat into… capitalism. It’s nice to imagine this is what the ‘people’ wanted, but who are the people driving it?
What do Trump and Christmas have in common and why was Lady Gaga so excited to sing at the intermission of the superbowl in a pink hat (and then doesn’t show it in her movie)? They all hold a certain reality in place, through fantasy, fake news and social acceptance by the mainstream. But, what would it take to break this reality?
This is my movie pitch…
Two women, who love one another and who are not psychobitches, and not escaping relationships with husbands (every other lesbian movie has a least one woman running away from a man or is a psychobitch), decide to escape christmas by catching a last minute flight to Marrakech. Arriving at midnight, after a short car ride, they are driven by moped to where they are gonna stay, a riyad, hidden away in a place with no street name, where surprisingly, queers are welcome. They spend the next four days exploring souks, resisting hagglers, eating, sleeping, drinking mint tea and loving. They take a trip out to the Atlas mountains, where their next stop over is. They are horrified that the place they are gonna stay at, which looked like luxury on the internet, en route to getting to it in the car, all they see is kids without shoes, playing out in plastic strewn rubble. The luxury of where they are going to stay, feels suddenly disgusting, they can’t sleep at night, they confront the hotel owner and cut short their stay.
No babies are born, there are no miracles, there is no turkey and there are no presents and yet there is still poverty.
If the movie doesn’t get made, well there you have it, we will never know what’s on the other side of a reality without Christmas.
In the meantime, if you think Einstein was smart and you have cash to spare, check out what Einstein set up or my personal Manchester favourite. Reality is not suspended for some, Christmas or otherwise. Harsh but even in my delirium, I know its true.
See you on the other side, when we are awake again.
In the meantime, here’s a snippet of Einstein’s story as a scientist with socially just compassion.
We so need, what was that show, with puppets… spitting image… ah well, this will have to do…